Y’all thought I had joined the track team or something, didn’t ya’?  The day I sprint, would be the same day the pig flew over the chocolate moon and took a bite out of it.  It’d look like a massive batch of Jell-O Jigglers during an earthquake up in this here joint… me sprinting. 

“Sprinter” obviously refers to the season between Winter and Spring in which Mother Nature’s PMS gets WAYYYYY out of control and she unleashes all of her mood swings at once… usually she is crying and frigid.  Women anyway… geez!!!!!  Example… I decide to test my shopping cart handle germitis and venture out on a short walk Friday afternoon (after 8 billion days being cooped up with the heebie jeebies).  Looked like a glorious day… and by glorious, I mean the regular grey clouds and no sunshine days that we are so used to here during winter.  Ten minutes into the walk and it starts snowing from out of nowhere!  It’s like the heavens opened up and were all like… “Whitney, thy buttest should growest on the couchest!”  It’s a conspiracy, I tell you!  And then to make matters worse it starts tornadoing (aka mildly windy)… so it’s snowing and tornadoing and here I am hacking up a lung caught out in the middle of it.  By the time I got to shelter I looked like a drowned rat… so, now I’m convinced I just caught pneumonia (hypochondriac, what’s that?)  Note to self:  return broken ruby slippers… clicked heels 3 times and chanted ‘there’s no place like home’ and was still sitting in the middle of said tornado.

The effects of sprinter on the geezer cat... she's obviously frozen stiff... poor thing!


I’ve decided in order to get my outdoor walking in I need to move to Bermuda… either that or Hell because I’m pretty sure it don’t snow near the flaming pitchfork in Hell.  Oh, sprinter… how I dislike thy PMS!

Question of the Day:  What did you do for yourself this weekend?



Filed under Exercise

11 responses to “Sprinter…

  1. Karen

    You make me start my day with a smile! Helps me accept another day of dark and dreary and snow the end of March.

  2. Louisa

    Hey Whitney! I felt the Sprinter’s wrath this weekend too!
    Saturday we went to my youngest’s Pinewood Derby and it was just cold and gray. While we were at the race, it dumped 2inches of WET snow on us. Weren’t WE surprised when we went out to the vehicle?!?!
    It continued to snow the rest of that day and overnight too.
    Crazy weather!
    Needless to say, I didn’t get my workout or a walk in on Saturday but I took our lunch and snacks along so I woudln’t be tempted to be naughty.
    I made sure to workout Sunday and bust my hump at work ( cleaning my building ) to make up for it…lol
    I weigh this week and I am hoping for lbs lost.

  3. I’m done with Sprinter. I’m ready for solid spring and no more snow! I think the mountains are pretty when they’re white, but I’m ready for some green. Hope you get rid of your crud soon.

  4. Jenalee Berger

    Ha ha! Yea, I’m sick or sprinter too! I just want spring!

  5. Jacque Hunt

    Soooo Whitney, I know that you need a break but I really hate the weekends and not having your blog to make me smile. I was glad for Monday (today) to roll around so that I would have a little humor to get me through the day. And today was yet another dark and dreary day. We woke up to 2 more inches of snow this morning. This weekend I didn’t get in a lick of exercise because of working three nights in a row and then staying up all day following those shifts to celebrate birthdays. But it was worth it. Now I’m praying for sunshine so that I can get back out there and walk.

    • Jacque… I can’t believe you are even alive after your marathon of working nights and staying up days!!! I’d be passed out for an entire week if I were you! Get some sleep woman… by the time you wake up maybe it will be summer!!

  6. MJ5898

    You totally crack me up! Just the thoughts of you hacking up a lung in the middle of a swirly snow storm brought tears to my eyes – I know, not nice finding humor in other’s tragedy, but you just tell it in such a funny way…

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