Ask anyone who knows me well (all 2 people) and they’ll tell you I’m the queen of sarcasm! Like, if there was a sarcastic person convention, I would be the club president. Kind of like the “Hair Club For Men” but for sarcastic people… with and without hair follicles. I think there is a place for sarcasm… in a teasing sort of way… and I have a dagnabbed blast with that kind of sarcasm; sparring back and forth with my sarcastic buddies (holla… you know who you are)! But then there’s the brand of sarcasm that can also make a person very cynical and ugly and hateful and negative. I’ve had that brand of sarcasm before. For most of my life, I can’t ever say that I saw the glass half full… it was more all the way empty, crushed by a giant flat-footed Gildabeast, and then served at the local diner masquerading as Oatmeal. Mmmm… shardy.
I can guarantee you the reason I was so sarcastic and negative and hateful was because I didn’t like myself nor the life I was making for myself. My hateful brand of sarcasm was a defense mechanism to hide that fact. I think I covered up my negativity somewhat when I was out in public (the few times they had a sale at the donut shop), but when I was home alone or with my family, it was full force on the negativity train… we make stops at Self Loathing Avenue and Needs An Attitude Adjustment Boulevard!
My constant negativity was wearing me down… pulling me into that pit of “you are worthless and stupid” brain parties… and when you feel that way about yourself, where are you going to find the strength and that little spark of hope needed to make a change? It’s buried so deep you’d need to hire a construction crew and a couple of sticks of dynamite to dig it out.
The song choice today is “Good Life” by OneRepublic (one of my favorite bands)! Because despite all the trials and tribulations and hard times, 50% of my outlook on life is determined by my attitude (TOTALLY just pulled that percentage out of my rear… take that statisticians!!) I could waltz around my life (except, not really waltzing because I’ve been banned from ever moving in any sort of dancing motion to any kind of music in public ever again) seeing everything with a grey hue and depress myself to spinach season and back… or I could don my rose-colored glasses every once in a while, do a jig, and actually take a good long look at the blessings in my life. They are there, despite how many times I wanted to cover them up with all the “short end of the stick” problems I had. I truly do think it takes twice as much energy (wow, being a statistician is totes the easiest thing in the world) to stew in your own negativity than it does to have a grateful outlook. I know my brand of stewing didn’t do a thing for my energy levels… and talk about zit city, batman!
Now I wear my rose-colored glasses every once in a while… every time I do, I’m building up that faint spark that’s buried deep down in my nether regions. It is a good life… most of the time!
Good Life by OneRepublic
When you’re happy like a fool
Let it take you over
When everything is out
You gotta take it in
Oh, this has gotta be the good life
This has gotta be the good life
This could really be a good life, good life
Say oh, got this feeling that you can’t fight
Like this city is on fire tonight
This could really be a good life
A good, good life
Question of the Day: Put on your rose-colored glasses right now… what are you grateful for at this exact moment?