I’ve drawn the winner of the bag of Chip’Ins and bottle of Fuze! Y’all can’t even handle the suspense, can you? Did I forget to mention that hidden inside the bag of Chip’Ins was a $1,000,000 bill? Ooops… my bad. Of course I’m lying… the day I find that amount of money ANYWHERE is the day I take off for the Bahamas. See you, Sprinter!! More on that later.
What were we talking about? Oh, yes… the winner of my first giveaway. I used a very scientifical method to pick said winner, all of these logarithms and Einstein equations and… Forget it… I’m not fooling anybody. I made a numbered list, put all of your names next to the numbers (the people who entered on both Facebook and the blog were entered under 2 separate numbers) and then I went to Random.org and typed in for them to pick a random number between the numbers 1 and 23 (oh my laws… can I please bore you any more? Y’all set your alarm clock for 30 more seconds and I should be done with all of this boring crap… power nap!) The lucky number picked was number 10!! Person number 10… step forward and claim your prize… What’s that you say? You have no idea how to read my jumbled mind? The winner… drumroll….
Woo hoo! Go, Ericka, it’s yo’ birfday… we gonna party like it’s your birfday! I will send you a separate email to get your info, Ericka! Thank you all for entering. Stay tuned because I plan on having more giveaways… I think the next giveaway will be a doozy… my favorite pair of underoos purchased in 1997… KIDDING! I would never do that to you all. You ever wonder what’s wrong with those people who give away used underwear to goodwill? Seriously!? Major brain malfunction.
Next up… the weekend… this is how I spent most of my weekend:
WEEPING!! Only because it’s been snowing every day all day since Thursday. Oh, the humanity! Picture this… you’re a kid and your mom tells you that you will be going to a party… a party filled with all your friends and candy and pillows made out of chocolate pudding and genies that pop out of lanterns and grant you your favorite wish and you just so happen to be best friends with Donald Trump… and then when you get to this magical party land, you spend the whole time waist deep in cow manure. That’s pretty much what a week of snowing during spring is like! My mom told me I needed to count my blessings and be grateful that the sun poked it’s head out of the clouds and fog for approximately 1 hour last evening… you know what I said to that? Cow Pucky!! I’ll be grateful when I get 2 days in a row of no snow/cold/rain. Take that and serve it for dinner! Grateful my rear femur!
Meanwhile, I’ve been numbdumb eating like it’s New Year’s Eve 1999 and all the computers are about to explode in that whole Y2K catastrophe some computer geeks made up after they finished solving logarithms on their computing systems. I was walking around in my state of anger and frustration and depression over the craptastic weather, eating everything within arm’s length. I know I’m an emotional eater and I usually can curb that when I think long and hard about what emotion I’m having… but at this point, I haven’t cared to think about it. I’d just rather numbdumb eat it away. I got out last night during the 1 hour of sun peeking out of the clouds, and even though it was frigid, it gave me a chance to clear my head and remember what I’m doing here. My brain yelled at my mouth… STOP… and hopefully that was enough to jolt it out of it’s stupidity. I tell you what, seasonal affective disorder (SAD) ain’t here to make friends… she’s here to take prisoners! No worries, though, I already have a plan… I plan on calling my good pal Donald Trump to bail me out of this mess. Donald… you hungry for some leftover Snickers?
Put this into perspective, Whitney. The spring fog will clear… there’s never been a time when it hasn’t!
Question of the Day: What do you do to lift your spirits during neverending Sprinter (aka Winter masquerading as… Winter)?