My brain is broken and I can’t think of anything somewhat coherent to type tonight/this morning (no, it is not because it is 3:00 a.m. in the morning… I type every night at 3:00 a.m. in the morning). It might have something to do with the day I had today… I’ll blame it on that. Since I can’t think of an intelligent topic, I’ll just blather on about my bad luck day.
Got up this morning to go to the Driver’s License division to get my driver’s license renewed. They sent me a renewal notice that said I had to show up in person to renew my license by November 1st, 2010. LOL… so, of course I got right on that, it being only April 13, 2011, and all. What’s bad about driving around on an expired license for 6 months anyway? I get to the office, fill out the form, and the guy looks at my “old” license and is like… um… DUH… this doesn’t expire until 2014. And I’m all like… DUH… then why are you sending me renewal letters in the mail? And he’s all like, we didn’t send you any letters… and I’m all like, let me ask my parole officer. And he’s all like, maybe you dreamed it… and I’m all like, you ever tasted a knuckle sandwich?
Accomplishment #1: Making a fool of myself at the Driver’s License Office (oh, and they also told me I had to get a new birth certificate because my mom laminated mine at birth and they won’t accept laminated papers… FYI… lamination totally ruins the magical powers of the birthing certificate… thus rendering it useless… but shiny!)
After a rousing row with the Driver’s License dude, it was time for lunch. I went to Great Harvest and got my usual… Pilgrim Sandwich with NO Turkey, NO stuffing, and NO mayo… basically it was going to be bread, lettuce, tomatoes, mustard, and cranberry sauce. I get it and drive to a park to sit out under the gloomy grey sky, open the sandwich and there is turkey GALORE and stuffing AND mayo. Which would totes be fine if I wasn’t a vegetarian and was trying to calorize! Come on, Fred! I tried picking the meat pieces out but it’s like they mixed the turkey in with the cranberries and veggies and mayo… it wasn’t coming… so I threw that away.
Accomplishment #2: Throwing away a perfectly good $6 sandwich instead of sending it to the starving children in Ethiopia because I’m too whimpy to take it back and demand a remake! (side note: I bought Einstein’s new 140-calorie bagel thin instead with lite shmear and some veggies… tasty, meat-free, and the counter dude was possibly the NICEST customer service person I have ever come across… thank you Einstein counter dude for restoring my faith in customer service. )
Lunch done, I decide it’s time to get in some exersaucing. It’s a grey day (per usual), but I hadn’t seen any rain up till then. I decide to head up the canyon to this walking trail up there. Get up there, start walking the trail and 5 minutes in this huge-mongous wind storm crops up out of nowhere… like I’m literally having a hard time walking against it and there’s dirt and dust being thrown around in my eyes like it’s powdered sugar day at the donut shop… then to top it off, it starts to pour rain. I don’t want to be stuck here when the wicked witch of the west’s house falls on my head, so I turn around and make my way back to my car. When I get there, I wipe my face off with a napkin… totally black from all the caked-on dirt. And you know what… as soon as I got back in my car… the rain and wind stopped like Moses was about to be parting the Red Sea and had to wait for me to get out of the way or something.
Accomplishment #3: War paint DONE.
Now that the tornado is over, I decide to go to a different trail in another canyon… the River Trail. I drive there and start to walking only to realize that the thing is very muddy… like I could probably swim in it if I wanted to. I keep on walking, though, because I’m an idiot and then immediately get stuck in a hail storm at the next bend in the trail… A HAIL storm… Then to top it all off, I was nearly attacked by 3 very large dogs (one a pit bull) NOT on leashes because their owner didn’t think anyone would be walking the trail on a bad weather day like today.
Accomplishment #4: Been to Hail and back.
Thank goodness I bought me a new punching bag at Ross for 3.99… because I went home and took out my frustrations by knocking it to timbucktwo and back. TAKE that, you measley day! I’m thinking of just sitting on the couch tomorrow. I’m hoping to get beamed up by space aliens in the process. Take me to your leader!!