For anyone who truly knows me, you must know about my decision-making skillz. They’re horrendous! If the world were going to end in 3 minutes and I had to pick which color of coffin I wanted and if I didn’t pick before 3 minutes, I’d combust into 5 bajillion tiny pieces and float for the rest of eternity as air particles in Lady Gaga’s hairspray container, I’d be air particles. Either that, or in the last 10 seconds, I’d pull out the reliable eenie meenie miney mo thing. I’m not sure what it is about decisions that scare the air particle out of me. Actually, I do know. It’s my constant fear of failure. What if I pick this and it was the wrong choice? What then? Or what if I pick the wrong restaurant for girl’s night out and my friends never speak to me again? CoughcoughWELCOMETOPATHETICSVILLECoughcough!!
That was one of the many reasons I didn’t finish college the first time. Decisions. I couldn’t for the life of me decide what to major in. What if I picked one where I couldn’t get any work? What if I picked one that I hated? What am I good at that I could be competent enough to carry on in a job? I had no idea! And I still have no idea. That’s why I’m 33, going back to school with an undeclared major and a rutabaga red-faced student ID card.
The thing about me, in my mind’s eye anyway, is that I suck at a lot of things and I’m “good” at a few things, but I’m not GREAT at anything… and aren’t you supposed to be great in your chosen career path? I’ll think of possible majoring options but then I’ll immediately bring up a 6000-item list of the reasons why I’d eventually suck at that. For example, technical writing… I’m not smart enough to be technical. I’m not eloquent enough to be technical. The phrase technical writer bores the bajoobus out of me. Sometimes I have a hard time thinking of intelligent-sounding words because I have so many words like bajoobus and crinkleydinkley floating around in my brain space, crowding out actual real words that make Einstein proud. That’s just reasons 1 through 4. Give me another major, I’ll do the exact same thing! I’ve got a reason for every last one of them.
Another part of my problem, I guess, is that I don’t really know all that’s out there as far as possible majors and what one would do with said major and what if I picked a minor too, how would I correlate the two? You see what a big ole blob of a mess I am? I tell you… it’s a miracle I don’t have padded walls and a closet full of strait jackets. What I think I need to do is find one of those tests… the ones you take that supposedly tell you what you’d be good at. The last time I took one of those, though, WAYYYYYYYYYYYY back in high school, it told me I should become a librarian. Great… except the last time I read a whole book, hammer pants were big. NEXT! I made a goal that I have this semester to decide a major… write it down, sign it in blood, and finish the sucker. That’s only a few more months… oh bajooobus… where the crap is my strait jacket!
Question of the Day: Any suggestions for majors? How did you pick a major?