No, I didn’t misspell that first word, you English majors with a stick up your vocabulary… it is referring to the fleshy creatures one slaps on the barbecue with a side of horseradish… which incidentally does NOT come from a horse… thank you very much, Burger King! The kind of meat of which I have not sampled for 4+ years as one of those really annoying vegetarian people… which I really regret telling anyone because you know how people are… when they think vegetarian, they think really healthy skinny waif of a creature… not some lumbering rhino in a pink tutu. Give it up… all vegetarians ain’t Twiggy… and all meat eaters ain’t Fat Albert… it’s the way of the world. I like to think of it as me bucking the system… take that ye who judge on outward appearance!
That paragraph made sense only 1/3 of the time and I’m only working on 1/3 attention span right now, so you’ll have to forgive my ramblings. Back to the topic. Saturday, Madre was heading up Salt Lake City way to take Lindsay to a cooking class at Orson Gygi. Something about a belated birthday present. I, of course, said I didn’t want to attend the cooking class only for the reason that it’s hard to get out of sampling all the meat dishes. I decided very last minute that I’d ride down anyway and sit in the car in the parking lot for 3+ hours reading my Biology textbook and memorizing words for The Garden. Quality time spent… some creepy chic wearing a Snuggie sitting in the parking lot. I thought it would be good motivation for me to get those things the crap done… because there was nothing else to take my attention away (coughcough… besides the half hour nap I snuck in coughcough)! Turns out there are other things to do in a parking lot full of people coming and leaving… I watched a lady picking a wedgie for 15 good minutes of non-quality entertainment. I also got to experience a nasty overflowed toilet when I thought I should use the public restroom, but upon entering and seeing the floor full of water, I decided I could hold it for 2 more hours… UTI here I come! It’s a wonder I even had time to crack open the textbook!
When the madre and sister were done, we had to stop by Ruby Snap Gourmet Cookies… holy cowfriends those things are good! They were giving out samples of some new kind of cookie… described to me as a maple chocolate chip cookie… safe, right? I bit into it and got a cookie full of bacon! The HORRORS!!!! 😛 How mature is it to spit out a mouthfull of food? Because I’m thinking it’s at least 30-something-year-old mature… correct? Nothing against flabby pig flesh, but I so wasn’t ready to partake in the bacon flavoring… especially next to a chocolate chip… that’s just blasphemous right there! My favorite of the cookies I tried was a cookie called The Lilly… a lemon cookie with lemonheads and lemon glaze… she’s so silly! Or there was this cherry one that was fan-freaking-tabulous! Calorizers of the world, unite! 😛 NOT!
Lessons learned… next time wear blindfolds in the parking lot for 3 hours, bring a catheter, and never trust a maple cookie! I think that was a day full of accomplishments if you ask me… and nobody did but I’m telling you anyway!
Question of the Day: What’s your favorite cookie flavor? What’s the weirdest food you’ve had containing bacon?