The limit of stupid to the nth degree is named Knit-Whit! I have lost my mind. Alzheimer’s has set in at age 34 and I plan on moving into the padded wall portion of the facility as soon as the warden releases me. BLUGHHHHH!!! Take that and smoke it. Why am I ranting like a lunatic? Because it’s punishment for forgetting to do TWO quizzes before the due date these past few weeks in my Biology class. I’m not too optimistic about my Unit 3 closed-book exam that I need to go up to the University to take by Saturday either. It’s a combination of having too many things on my mind at once and pretty sure the other part is young-onset Alzheimer’s… what’s my name again? Basically, I just need someone to volunteer (this ain’t no paying gig… who do I look like? Oprah?) to follow me around 24/7 with a pen and a notebook and whap me upside the head when I need to do something. I don’t care if your whapping is hard as long as I’m still able to sit up unassisted for at least 30 minutes. Send your applications to someone else because I’ll misplace them and/or forget why I’m getting them.
In other news… my car, which was supposedly fixed up at the service station last week when they replaced my fuel line is once again playing that game where Beulah the Buick drives me to a place just fine and dandy, but then refuses to start when I want to drive her back home. Does that mean she has been traumatized by my driveway? Is she subconsciously blaming herself for when I slipped on the ice and broke my wrist whilst cleaning her windshield and now she can no longer face the pavement that it happened on? GET OVER YOURSELF, BEULAH!! Back up to the service station. Note to self: consider getting a younger less emotionally-needy car next car purchasing time.
In yet further news… The Garden opens in exactly ONE WEEK from today, which means my Alzheimeric brain best get it’s butt in gear to memorize this whole fligflabbed book of music. It’s really a powerful program (if you pay attention and listen to the words). If anyValleyites are still interested in coming and haven’t bought tickets, I’d recommend buying them in advance at that above-mentioned link on account of the fact that you will save a whole 2 bucks per ticket if you buy them online… and that’s enough to buy a Diet Dr. Pepper… x2… right, Madre!? According to Madre… happiness is going to 7-11 on Saturday, filling up a cup she found in the backseat of the car with Diet Dr. Pepper hoping to get the refill price, and then getting it for free because the cup she used to refill was smaller than an average refiller cup. Now that’s happiness… in Madre’s world. Meanwhile, in my world happiness is discovering a half eaten bag of M&Ms in my desk drawer. They were probably 3 years old… but they’re like astronaut food… and that meant that 3 years ago I didn’t actually scarf down the whole bag in one sitting… that there was an accomplishment for any year. Take note of that Whitney of the year 2013… okay?
Question of the Day: How is your memory? What do you use to remind yourself to do something?