I have a new thing to argue with the insurance company about… yep… 4 months later I’m still arguing about my broken wrist bills… which number more than the smart people in an insurance company call center. That’s not a stereotype… it’s a scientific fact I have taken great lengths to prove after having talked to pretty much every single one of them over the last 4 months. For the first however many months, I was arguing back and forth between the health insurance company and the auto insurance company because of the invisible automobile accident I was in when I broke my wrist… fyi scraping the ice off of your car window now counts as an automobile accident. I wonder how much insurance company arguing I can get in this summer when I attempt to chisel off the 4 feet of bird doo on my car windows. My new argument? The thousand-dollar fee I was charged from seeing an out-of-network provider… which totes makes sense if I had any choice in the matter, but this out-of-network doctor I saw just so happened to be in the emergency room on the night I broke the dagnabbed thing. And obviously, caring about which doctor was in-network when I felt like I’d been run over by a 500-pound linebacker was the first thing that popped into my mind. “Golly gee, Mr. Doctor… you don’t live in the Blue Shield network? I don’t think I can allow you to provide me pain relief in the form of hallucinogenic Percocet.” Besides that, you don’t get a choice of doctor when you go to the dagnabbed emergency room… there’s one… end of story… the other option is to go see Homeless Joe on the corner for a stash of the good stuff.
So, that’s my new debate club topic. I suck at debating with them too because my argument never comes out of my mouth as eloquently as my brain seems to think it should… it’s usually something like… DUH… well that’s the stoop-idest thing I’ve ever heard!?!? Can you tell why I won Miss Congeniality at the Junk Yard Smelly Pageant? This one lady the other day wasn’t quite getting the fact that I had no choice in the matter of which doctor I saw in the ER. She kept saying that I could have asked if he was in-network and then if he wasn’t, I had the choice to leave rather than incur the thousand-dollar fee. Sure, I had the choice to leave… my arm all bent in a weird shape like I’d decided to turn into Gumby… why don’t I run out for a burger first until change of shift.
America, the Beautiful… the home of the fries and the insurance companies trained at the Chuck-E-Cheeses!
If this comes off a little snarky it’s because my teeth have decided to turn on me and instead of eating food, they’ve decided it would be a great idea to throb painfully like I done stuck my mouth with a thorny rosebush plant. Two dental visits/bills later and all I got was this aching gumline. Bring it, Disneyland!
Question of the Day: Do you enjoy debating? Any tips?
Tee hee hee… SPRING! No matter that it’s like we ain’t in Kansas anymore, Toto, the last 2 days and nights… there are buds!