RIP Ugly Rocking Horse Shoes…

I have this stupid commercial song stuck in my head, and seeing as there are only like 5 words in the entire song, it’s like I’m one of those wind-up monkeys that play the cymbals until the wind-up winds down, except my wind-up is stuck in the on position for ETERNITY!!  Firstly, those women doing the twist because they get to wear diapers is false advertising!  I ain’t never done the twist for that reason… like almost NEVER!  Meanwhile, I’ll be over here rocking in the corner in shackles, mentally humming the Diaper Twist song if you need me.

Nextly, it’s been a sad week for hideously uglified shoes… my gun metal, see-me-walking-from-20-miles away Mary Jane shape-up shoes are toastified!  I went to strap the strap on them the other night and the whole thing tore right off.


You can’t see it from this angle, but these have a sole shaped like a rocking horse the size of Montana.  I mostly wore them to make the fashionistas in my life cringe in agony.  😛  (coughcough You are welcome, Madre and Lindser coughcough).  I’ve mentioned in the past that these here rocking horse shoes are the only shoes that don’t make the balls of my feet scream when I wogercise.  With normal-people shoes the ball of my foot grinds into the cement/asphalt, causing burning and firey feet for several days.  Kind of like the friction that one would use to start a Scouting campfire… except with my feet and stuff.  They’re not fixable, so I chucked the suckers in the garbage pail and am now entering the grieving stage of favorite shoe loss.  To make me seem less crazy, I ONLY wore these to exercise… it’s not like I was walking around town trying to look like a fashionistas worst nightmare.  (Okay, scratch that… I do that with my clothing choices).  It seems they don’t make this particular shoe any more, so now the hard task of finding a shoe that is just as hideous that won’t cause the weird friction foot issue.  Wish me luck!

Meanwhile… a friend and I took a walk on the River Trail one night last week.  It was like 103 degrees in the shade on that particular night and I was wearing the shoes that make my feet feel like a fire ball.  Needless to say, I was kind of cranky.  So, we were walking along, me being all crankified when all of a sudden this little boy (I’d say 3 years old) grabbed my hand with this hugely muddy palm and started pulling me in the other direction wanting to show me something.  I obliged, even though my inner OCD germ-a-phobe was freaking out at having his muddy hand in mine, and walked over to this mud pile with some twigs sticking out of it.  Apparently, it was a castle… according to little muddy-hand boy.  I complimented him on his mud plop and made a note to tell his mom to review the never take strangers by the hand rule.  I could have been Willy Wonka’s psycho cuzzin, Pervert Wonka for all they knew!   Despite the firey feet and the firey temperature and the muddy hands, I had a smile on my face for the rest of the walk.  So, thank you small naive dirty person for reminding me to stop and view the mud piles.

Question of the Day:  Are you loyal to a certain brand/type of shoe?  If so, what kind?  

Some of you met my meese friend, Leroy when I posted pics on FB… but for those who didn’t, we’re pretty much best buds.  He says hi.





Filed under Exercise

11 responses to “RIP Ugly Rocking Horse Shoes…

  1. Avster

    I just like my shoes to fit well. I don’t really care about the brand… just how they fit and the quality of the shoe.

    I’d ask if you took a photo of the mud plop but then I guess your hand was probably kind of muddy at this point and one doesn’t want to get the camera muddy. :b

    So is Whit going to purchase another pair of fashonista-annoyer shoes?

    • Muddy camera is not on my list of top 10 ideas!! And heck yes, I’m going to buy me some hideous fashionista annoyer shoes… and this time I aim to wear them EVERYWHERE!

  2. tjs616

    If you’re lucky enough to fit into a 9.5 I have a pair of shape ups here that you are welcome to. I got them for Christmas a couple years ago, and I really wanted them, and they are really comfortable, but somehow they never got worn. They are the sneaker style, as opposed to the Mary Jane, but would still do the trick. What kind of socks are you wearing out? I get the weird forefoot burn if I try to wear cotton or thin socks even if they are supposedly designed for exercise. My favorite ones now are the thorlo experia. Most of the sock is kind of mesh so my foot stays cool and dry but the forefoot and heel have more padding than most socks. They are a little more expensive than regular socks, but I wear them almost exclusively now when I exercise. As for your shoe question, when I was jogging/running I wore a shoe appropriate to my gait (overpronation) and I absolutely love Brooks. The correction takes a week or two to get used to (just like I bet your rocking horse shoes did) but shortly after I was able to walk a half marathon and eventually worked up to running/jogging 5ks – halfs.

    • So close to your shoe size! I wear a 10.5, but since they don’t make that size I either squish into a 10 or my shoes are too big in an 11! But THANK YOU for the offer. Also, thank you for the sock tip. All this time I never considered my socks may be the problem. I’m going to have to try these ones you speak of. Thanks, TJ… and I hope you are doing okay… still sending you thoughts and hugs!

  3. Dessawade

    Asics brand shoes are my favorite. They fit me the best but they can be very pricey.

  4. Alena

    Sorry that your shoes bit the dust–Unfortunately I have no good advice on the matter 🙂 Darling story. I’m sure the little boy could tell you weren’t related to Willy Wonka. You are much to normal-like 🙂

    • I’m not sure about the normal-like comment, I can get some kids a-screaming from just having looked at me! 😛 It’s a skill. In the meantime, so that big ole commotion last night down at your mom’s neighbors… I hope she got some sleep… too freaky!

  5. I am loyal to my Teva sandals. I own 3 of the same style but different colors. I just ordered me a new pair yesterday along with a pair of toddler ones for Cruzy. Love that brand.

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