Woggercizing in Sweater Vests…

About 3 to 5 times per week, I head down to my favorite research park to woggercize (for those of you not up on Knit-Whit vernacular, woggercize is my word combining power Walking/Jogging/Fat Blobs Woggling like a Walrus/Exercise… though if I were to be honest, it’s 48% power walking, 2% jogging, and 50% fat blobs woggling like a walrus).  That’s beside the point.

I love woggercizing at this particular place because it is convenient, has lighting if I go in the dark, has mostly evenly-paved sidewalks (well, except for that time a few years ago when I tripped and hit my head on the pavement and then walked around with a concussion, 2 black eyes, a huge cut under my chin, and a goose egg the size of an ostrich egg on my forehead for 3 weeks), etc.  Because I go there regularly, I usually run into the same people… the regular research park walkers… it’s a very exclusive club… except we basically try to avoid each other so as not to have to socialize whilst huffing and puffing and woggling.

There’s the chick who wears the black hoodie and has 2 yappy doggies who hate every single gut in my fat blobs.  I only try to avoid her so she doesn’t have to try to reign them both in when they go ballistic in my presence.  One of them doggies hates me so much he growls at me every time I’m within 20 feet of his highness.  I’ve convinced myself that she actually just lives at the park because no matter what time of day/night I am there (and I’ve tested this theory by showing up at all different hours of the day), she is ALWAYS there.  I know what her car looks like and I know that her dogs think I’m a cat or a woggling mongoose… and they be hungry for blood!

Then there’s the friendly older guy who ALWAYS, without fail, wears the same heavy grey sweater vest and gloves.  I don’t care if it’s 95 degrees in the shade, he’s wearing the grey sweater vest and the gloves.  We always wave at each other as we pass by, and he always says something about the weather.  I haven’t gotten up the nerve to ask about his attire… but it’s cold enough now to warrant wearing a sweater vest and gloves, so I’ll let him be.

There’s the pacing smoker, taking a break from work whilst pacing back and forth smoking a cigarette.  There’s the muumuu-wearing shuffler… the older lady on an evening stroll wearing a muumuu (you see, Madre… by making fun of your muumuus, I’m trying to protect you from becoming that muumuu-wearing shuffler).

As you can see, we all have much in common.  Next time I’m handing out invitations for our very first woggercizing club meeting… attire:  grey sweater vests and muumuus… NO GROWLING DOGS ALLOWED!

PS – Thank you to all of the men and women out there who have so bravely served our country in the armed forces.  Y’all are gems and we are all grateful for your sacrifices! 



Filed under Exercise

16 responses to “Woggercizing in Sweater Vests…

  1. Avster

    I’ll come woggersize with you! It sounds fun and a little amusing, though I think if I went with you the dog lady wouldn’t be able to hold her dogs back. :s

    I love the bottom shot!

  2. Dessawade

    Be careful what you say about mumu’s cause I am going to donate mine to you once I die. You’ll love them I know you will! You just have to try them once and you are hooked.

  3. Chantal

    Woggersize….!!!! You are too funny! I had a good laugh again this morning! Thanks!

  4. How funny that you have a group of regulars there. They sound like interesting people. Hopefully I can meet them someday when I visit and we can walk together.

  5. Jessica Jensen

    It has been a while! I needed a dose of Whitney! Never fails to make me happy and laugh. The pictures make me homesick! I miss the classiness of the Logan regulars. Here in Mo. There is a whole new level of “regulars” who work out here. The shirtless man who desperately needs a shirt, the unleashed dogs full of ticks and fleas, and the granny…smoking and pushing a stroller at the same time. Classy!

    • Hi Jessica! Wow… sounds like quite the regulars in MO. If you were close to Branson, I might be interested to see the fake rhinestones out woggercizing! That granny sounds like a class act! I think of you and wonder how y’all are every time I drive by your old place! 🙂

      • Jessica Jensen

        Yeah, unfortunately the bedazzled people are about two hours southish of here….not really sure of my directions anymore without my mountains.

  6. Oh wow, that place is beautiful! I miss Autumn already… all the leaves are already gone, the sky is now in a permanent state of gray, and I am ready to hibernate for the winter! haha I love the descriptions of the people you meet at the park. Sounds very entertaining!

  7. Alena

    Beautiful pictures!!! That research park is a great walking spot.

  8. Louisa

    Beautiful pics Whitney!
    Love your descriptions of your fellow research park go-ers.
    Keep on movin!

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