There were a lot of things I could have chosen to blog about this week… several happenings… several non-happenings… several rants and raves about absolutely nothing, which is usually the case. Instead, I’ve decided to regale you… all 2 of you… with the time, this past weekend, where I turned into Ma Ingalls from Little House On the Prairie… except without all the horse crud and children… and actual hardships… and pantaloons. So, pretty much exactly like a day in the life… except not at all!
It all started Saturday afternoon around 1-ish with an explosion in some far away power pole, which resulted in a fire, which then resulted in 17 houses being without power for the next 5-ish to 7-ish to 800-ish hours. I have no earthly clue what folks back in the olden days… the ones without socks and shoes who walked uphill both ways to a heater-less school… did without power! Madre or Padre… care to regale us with a tale from your childhoods? They must have lived like hooligans! Because Whitney was having none of it! Firstly without power, the refrigeration system does not refrigerate, and heck if I’m in the mood for a good ole-fashioned case of the Salmonella bug… so I found out (not through the Inter-waves, mind you… power takes that away too and my phone was invented in approximately 1925) that food is only good for 4 hours in a nonworking refrigeration system. So, of course all-things-expiration-date police was all over that and I made everyone help me buy bags of ice and put the contents of the refrigerator into coolers that we stored outside in the 30-degree weather.
Also… for the love of all things sanity… my microwave did not wave… the bathroom was pitch black… and my afternoon of planned homework time went out the window. Who owns actual books and paper in this day and age anyway? Five-ish to 7-ish to 800-ish hours later, after I’d safely stored my refrigerator food and confiscated the lantern from the garage cobwebs, the power finally came back on… and I swear to you I heard angels singing the Halleluah Chorus in the backyard. No joke.
That meant I had to dig in and do actual homework, which judging by the project I was working on was full-on Kindergarten stuff. My Earth Science professor is nothing if not eccentric, and his assignment this week was that we geezer college students should invent an alien planet with living creatures, determine a trophic pyramid of species, and finally invent at least 20 different species and draw them into a food web. A.) I ain’t no van Gogh… I literally flunked the stick figure art class I took in grade school. and B.) Um… okay.
Four hours and much cussing later, this is what it turned out like… I only wish I could change the age from 35 to 5-1/2… but then I got to thinking, van Gogh ain’t got a corner on the art market. I could make some big bucks with my Alien Space Food Web… let’s just call it Tentacle Night.
You bet your sweet ZotFish! Move over First Graders… I just moved into the building.
Pretty impressed with my ability to draw straight/non-crooked lines until I saw this masterpiece. Professor Eccentric might think I bribed a preschooler to do this piece of work!