Planconstramine…

I’ve come to terms with the fact that I won’t be having my own children in this lifetime (at some times better than others).  I’ve always felt a bit of a sadness when remembering this fact.  It’s not like I never wanted kids.  When I was a child and we played that M*A*S*H game… the one where you list how many kids you will have and their names, etc., I always had at least 10 kids.  I thought of names all day long as a kid, and even went as far as to dress my cats up in diapers and doll clothes… just for the practice… much to the chagrin of Fluffy and Company.  Life doesn’t always turn out the way you imagine it when you’re a kid… some pipe dreams just aren’t meant to be.  Things happened in my life the way they were supposed to, and though I’ve not dealt with all of my road blocks with as much grace as I once imagined I would, I do know that my purpose for this life is different than most.  I’m not sure I’ve found that purpose, unless it’s to be the germ-a-phobe police in a gallant effort to save someone from the dreaded Salmonella fiasco, but I guess one just plugs along making decisions as they come and living life as best as she/he can in the moment.

Boy, that was a long tangent.  My purpose was to illustrate the fact that I try to adopt other kids in my life.  There are my step-nephews, Christian and Ethan… but they’re pretty much grown up and no longer interested in cutsie things like owlies and piggies and cupcakes…  okay scratch that… I don’t think they were ever interested in owlies, piggies, and cupcakes!  😛  I’ve hijacked my cuzzin JenJen’s sons, Cruz and Blaize… who live way too far away.

I’ve tried to kidnap my cuzzin Angie’s kids, Makayla and Corbin… super fun kids who indulge in my owly obsession!  Example… this past Friday night we had pizza par-tay night… and Makayla made her pizza into the shape of an owlie…

I would have done it too, but that would have meant less toppings and hello… have you seen the size of my mouth?

I asked Corbin to smile with his pizza creation.  This was his best effort.

All this to say, my sister and brother-in-law, Lindsay and Shayne are expecting this coming August.  My first full-blooded niece or nephew.  I plan on kidnapping the little critter just in time for me to require diaper changes and toenail clipping sessions.  Can you imagine this kid’s life?  He/she best be moving 4 continents over before I hit 80!  In the meantime, I’ve got some Salmonella lessons to teach him/her.  Congratulations, Lindser, Shayne, Christian, and Ethan (and let’s not forget Gramsy and Grampsy Wade)!  Oh, and Lindsay… remember how worried you were as a kid that someone might come along in the family and steal your #1 choice for girl’s name, Planconstramine?  Your dreams have come true… it’s still totally available!  In the meantime, I’ll start crocheting a “Kick Me, My Name is Planconstramine” T-shirt!  You are welcome, Auntie Whitty Woo Woo.

Oh, and thank you to JenJen and Ang for allowing me to hijack your chillin’s!

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15 Comments

Filed under Family

15 responses to “Planconstramine…

  1. Very insightful Whitney about having a different purpose. I sure hope Lindsay doesn’t choose that name. And yes i agree that we live way too far away.

  2. Louisa

    My sister and a few of my friends have made that same decision, Whitney.
    They have their own terrific purpose and love to spoil my kids and others as well. They are a hoot to be around and come up with some of the most original things to say and do. They are refreshing and my kids feel special when they spend time with them.
    Big congratulations to Lindsay & Shayne on their little blessing coming in Aug.

  3. Alena

    Whitney, those kiddos are so lucky to have you! And their parents are too! I love the owlie pizzas 🙂 How exciting about the coming addition to the Wade clan!!! Congrats Lindsay and Shane–I hope your pregnancy is going well. And Whit, you are totally welcome to kidnap my kids anytime you want to come to this Artic wasteland 🙂

    • Thank you, sweet friend. I’d love to hijack your cute kids… but let’s face it… you need to move back this way considering our winter the last several weeks has been like spring on a cracker. You’d love it!

  4. Amber

    Whitney, I will be smiling all day for all of you, this child will be the most loved child that was ever born! I am so excited for you and for Lindsay and Shayne, Congrats!!!

  5. Dessa Wade

    Yes, it’s true. The new baby will be smothered with lots & lots of love from her Wade relatives and did I hear you say something about changing diapers Whitney:)

  6. Thanks for the tribute Whit! I would gladly let you steal said baby anyway anytime!

  7. deanna

    You are the best. I know Angie’s kid sure think you’re special.

  8. Faith

    Whitney, I’m totally with you on this one!

    And I always thought some of the kids you always hang out with were yours sister’s kids since you are so close. How amazing that you have been able to expand the aunt-niece/nephew relationship. I wish I could do that too, since I’m not likely to be an aunt for real for many years yet. It’s too bad that my most of my cousin’s life far away and that I never had close relationships with them for that reason and because of age difference. At least I have a couple of friends with kids. 🙂

    • Get you some friends kids to hang out with, Laura! It’s better than having our own kids because you get to give them back at the end of the day and don’t have to worry about screwing them up! 😛

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