Category Archives: Christmas

BoBear, The Unwrapping Prodigy…

I hope y’all had a very Merry Christmas full of family and food and fun.  What did y’all do?  What did you get?  What did you eat?  But most importantly… did you save some for me and the starving pigme goats in New Guinea!?  Yes, because I should be lumped in with anyone who be starving… said no one ever.

Our Christmas was very low key… and by low key I mean only one hot pad caught on fire… and the house did not burn down.  KNOCK ON ALL OF THE WOOD!  Which was great and all because it be freezing up in this dang joint.  I really enjoy weather below the zero mark… it makes me all tingly with anticipation of bathing suits and pina coladas!   INSERT SARCASM!

BoBear is 4 months old as of Christmas day and he got to open his first ever Christmas present… and a bang up job he did too.  I might just hire him next year to wrap all of my gifts.  He’s an wrapping/unwrapping prodigy as witnessed by the following video.

Big bro Ethan pretty much taught him all he knows in that department… not Lindsay who still opens her gifts like my grandma… Don’t rip the paper dear, we have to use that next year!

Merry BoBoBear Christmas to all and to all a good New Year’s!

Meanwhile… LucyFur has moved on from the reindeer family tree she’s been visiting since the beginning of the month to this half-eaten M&M candy cane.  I don’t make this stuff up… I just report it.

Nobody situated that candy cane on top of her… she just loves it and situated herself underneath it.

After she’s been wrestling with my bathroom shower rug every night and/or sticking her super long striped arms under the bathroom door when someone locks it on her, I’m thinking she needs a lesson in sanity.  Cabin Fever… it’s a real thing!  What will she sleep by next!?  Take a guess!

Happy New Year’s this week!  Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do… which is pretty much everything, except for sleep and eat.  So, do do things I wouldn’t do!

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Merry Christmas: 2015 In A Nutshell

I’ve decided to start a new tradition… okay, well it’s way too early yet to call it a tradition since this is year one and year two may see a decline in the go-get-it attitude.  The following video is pictures of this year’s happenings set to me singing really loudly… apparently… where’s my music technician!?  Mute might have to be your friend.  The pictures do not represent EVERYTHING that happened this year… that would make for a 12-hour Gilligan’s Island episode… and let’s face it… not even Gilligan was interested.  Without further adieu… Merry Christmas!

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Twas Days Before Christmas…

… and all through the house, all the presents weren’t boughten or wrapped by the louse.   Oh my stars and garters… Hallmark… hit me the heck up!  I’ve got a billion of these diddies just waiting around for your section of cheesy “just because” greetings.

This December has flown by and I feel like I wasn’t able to bask in the Christmas season like I wanted to.  It’s funny how we always get these grand ideas about what we will accomplish over the holidays, read a Christmas story every night before bed, sing songs, play Christmas duets on the piano, bake delectables, see the lights.  In reality, I’m lucky if I wear a pair of non-holy socks and drink a carafe of lukewarm water.  Totally accomplished both of those things this year, y’all!  Pats on the back all around.  Finals are finally over with and there are like 4 days before Christmas.  I figured out that in order to read my 25 days of Christmas stories in 4 days, I’m going to have to read like 6 per day… which is cool and all but let’s be totally honest… that ain’t happening, so let’s change that idea to 4 days of Christmas stories and shut my fly trap.

In other news, we were able to make it to the annual Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert again this year.  It’s magical to be in that crowd sitting next to the dude with the loud clap (Lindsay says he punctured her ear drums) and in front of the ladies who told jazzy scooter versus snow bank run-in stories all night.  There was the dude who came dressed up in his champion sweatsuit best… Lindsay enjoyed the monochramatic nature of his navy blue leisure suit amidst the sparkle of the prom dress worn by his wife.  One of the two of them didn’t get the memo, and I won’t say who.

There was the illegal parking maneuver witnessed by a carload of people, wherein because we were tired of trying to find a parking space for the tank, Madre lumbered out of the car in front of Joseph and Mary and the three semi-wisemen, and removed some orange construction cones… ta da… insta-parking place!  Take that people who think they know better than Madre!  It was a Christmas MIRACLE!  Madre also tried to do illegal ticket trading maneuvers with an older guy who was peddling sought-after concert tickets… she was trying to upgrade our balcony seats… to no avail.  Nosebleeds it is!   But then we wouldn’t have witnessed monochramatic leisure suit man!  It was a blessing in disguise!  Beautiful job choir and guest stars… next time let’s do it in the plaza.

Christmas piggy wiggly is my favorite!  He lights up in the dark too!

MERRY CHRISTMAS, Y’ALL FRIENDS… From my family to yours!

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Snow-Klutzing…

I’ve apparently lost my ever-living mind… or I’m discovering some of the cajones I lost two years ago when I slipped on the ice (yet again) and broke my wrist.  I have the balance ability of a very large abominable snowman perched on top of a knitting needle… catastrophe waiting to happen!  After that whole wrist kerfuffle, I swore I would never ever ever do anything snow/ice related again… that included skiing, ice skating, and snowshoeing… oh snowshoeing.  The ironic part of this whole thing is that I got snowshoes for Christmas exactly three years ago… the year before the wrist kerfuffle.  That year happened to be a crappy year for snow fallage, so I did not get out to try them.  The 2 years after I had a broken wrist and then had sworn off snow sports… you know me… daredevil Luigi and her magic wimp brain.

Imagine my delight when the opportunity to snowshoe presented itself to me the day after Christmas.  Oh, you kid… but I don’t!  I put on my dread brain before I went… you know the brain… the one who thinks up every catastrophic event that could possibly take place and then tries to figure a way to get out of it?  I had everything going… the one where I fell in the middle of the wilderness with a broken ankle.  I’d decided I’d use my zipper to reflect the light of the sun onto the snow in my glove so I could drink the water… and then try to murder a snow hare for supper… before or after I’d died of hypothermia I hadn’t really gotten to yet.  There was the one where I dropped the car keys that were in my coat pocket in the snow and then couldn’t find them so had to build an igloo using prairie grass… again, the hypothermia solution didn’t quite come to fruition.  I don’t do snow sports, so I had nothing warm to wear… no long-legged underroos or snow pants or tall socks… so I wore what I wear everyday… one pair of pants and a low-cut sock and crossed my fingers.  Madre, on the other hand had 18 layers and a snowsuit on… she’s much more vertically talented than I am.

Except in this instance… which I did not attempt!

I gotta say.  Wearing snowshoes is like wearing a big ole clown shoe and then remembering that your feet are bigger than what your head thinks they are.  My head was all like… size 10 feet… but my snowshoes were all like… size 8000000000.  It’s a weird sensation when you aren’t used to it.  When I’d finally taken the things off, I felt like they’d taken off the shackles that I’d worn as an imaginary character in Les Miserables.  I was free… FREE at last!

It was at this point that I was sure I’d be accosted by every character from Into The Woods whilst trying to stay upright on my gargantuan bear paws.

I found myself tripping several times… but I did not faceplant this time.  It’s a Christmas Miracle, Wilber!  Not even during the many times where I had to step off the trail into the deeper snow to let a cross country skiiers pass me by.  Of course I moved at the pace of a snail… tripping and hyperventilating all of the way.  Stupid dread brain!  To sum the experience up… I’d do it again.  It’s a great workout.  Hopefully the next time I’ll be able to find the off position on my dread brain so I can enjoy it more.  It’s broken, I tell you!

I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas!  What didja’ get?

PS – Does anyone have any recommendations for fairly clean television series that I could streamline before school starts again and withers my brain into oblivion?  Preferrably shows that can be watched online via Amazon Prime, Hulu, or Netflix?  I’m not into the nighttime soaps, so Grey’s Anatomy-type shoes are a thumbs down… but I’m open to other interesting ones!

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‘Twas Days Before Christmas…

… and clear as a bell all the mices were stirring in Whitney’s window well.  Oh mices… give it up!  Yuck, yuck, yuck!!

In other news… I cannot for the ever living daylight believe that Christmas is this week!?!?  SERIOUSLY!  Where did that month go?  I swear I finished finals a week ago then ta da… we’re here.  I keep thinking that I haven’t done enough enjoying of the season… it has more been a whirlwind.  That’s a shame… and something to work on in the future.  I have been enjoying my Christmas music on my woggercizing sessions… Kelly and Harry and Karen and Andy and Amy and Babs… basically all of the classics, which makes woggercizing at night in the cold bearable.  Although, we do not have snow right now (I ADORE!!!)  I take that back… we do have snow in the mountains, which is where all of the cool kids prefer it, but on the days it snows in the mountains, it rains in the valleys and Whitney and her klutz genes were not sore afraid when woggercizing.  KNOCK ON WOOD!

Lindsay wanted me to share her favorite new Christmas decoration… I call her Annabelle the Christmas Fairy.  Translation… she is freaky!  She’s worse than the Elf on the Shelf… and creepier… when you plug her in she waves her hands around like she’s about to start the house on fire with her candle of doom and gloom.  She’s like the stalker version of Mrs. Claus from a horror movie.

MERRY CHRISTMAS to you and yours, sweet blog readers!  To commemorate the occasion, I’m sharing a couple of my favorites:

Spectacular, Guinness !

Karen Carpenter is my favorite Christmas voice… and this is one of my favorite songs!

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Fon-Don’t!

I sure do hope y’all had a spectacular holiday week… a few more days to go and then it’s basically January for the next 6 months.  BRING IT!  Except I am more fond of February than January, so can I just call the next 6 months February until it thaws out and turns into June?  Okay?  Good.

My cat, Lucy-Fur already has cabin fever.  She runs around like an insane asylum enrollee on a regular basis. She misses her usual jaunts outside where she becomes one with the coyotes… except the friendly coyotes… and instead annoys me for 7 straight months.  I just kicked her out to use the bathroom (what’s a litterbox?  I will not own one of those… so any cat living with me must learn to use the giant outdoor litterbox.), after she decided to try to climb the shower curtain while I was in the shower, but guarantee within 10 more minutes she’ll be in my window well begging me to open the door.  It’s 7 degrees out there right now… that’s a veritable heat wave!

Here’s the part of her day where she waits for me to get the laser out so she can chase a little red dot like a mad thing.  Anyone have a kitty-sized strait jacket I could borrow for all 6 months of February!?

Meanwhile… we have a tradition that we try to eat fondue on Christmas Eve every year.  This year we got a bit lazy, and instead of making actual fondue, we bought this stuff at Sam’s Club where you can stick it in the micro-oven for 30 seconds at a time and melt you some chocolate to dip fruit and other deliciousities in.  We totes messed it up this year… and by messed it up, I mean it turned into dog doo rather quickly.

Video proof… I mean… who wouldn’t want to come to dinner!?  Anyone?

I also tried to get a family Christmas picture in front of the Christmas tree but by the time these 2 approved the picture they were in (just one more… I look like a pasty snowman… just one more… my head looks like it’s possessed… just one more…) everyone lost interest and left and I only got the 2 pickiest participants!

It’s no wonder we never do family pictures… besides the reason I refuse to be in one… but that’s beside the point.

Happy New Year this week, friends.  Party it up… and enjoy your 6 Februaries!

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Shuffling Ice Syndrome and Breath of Heaven…

I couldn’t decide which title to use, so I inappropriately used both of them.  Shoot me.  Neither one goes with the other, but I have ADD… give me a break… oh look, a shiny penny!

Now that my favorite season of all the seasons is here full force, which is winter… NOT… I find myself adopting a new mechanism for walking outside… and by walking outside I mean literally in parking lots and/or from the car to the house… not like exercise walking.  You couldn’t pay me 8 billion dollars to get me out woggercising with ice on the ground!  AIN’T HAPPENING!  The reason being?  Almost a year ago to the very day is when I was standing out in the driveway, still as a dead, frozen mouse, when all of a sudden my feet slipped out from underneath me and I broke my right wrist.  What followed was one of the most miserable winters in all of existence… and now… I find myself shuffling like an old lady, approximately 2 feet per hour and grabbing anyone’s arm who happens to be walking near me.  I get anxiety when I think of having to walk on or near ice because ice is deceptive… you think you’re sure footed and before you know it you’re lying on your back seeing drunken dancing sugar plums in front of your eyeballs.

It’s quite entertaining to watch… for everyone but me… and I’ve adopted chanting how much I adore winter (opposite day) and how I’m going to move from winter as soon as I can afford to.  You best believe it.  Save me that shack in Arizona nearest the ocean!  😛   I even dug out the clutz Christmas present I got from my sister one year.  These rubber majiggies that you stretch over the bottom of your shoe that are supposed to provide traction.  I wore them into Kneaders on Saturday evening, got one of the spikes caught in the carpet, tripped, and the thing came flying off my shoe and some poor chic who was trying to eat a sandwich in peace had to stand up and show me where my flying rubber spike had landed.  Thank all that be holy it wasn’t on someone’s eyeball!

I best get over it.  I start classes again on January 6th and I will have to navigate the icy USU campus for at least 4 months.  Meanwhile… who has a spare spike-studded walker I could borrow for 4 months?  😛  Oh, and a Valium.

As for the 2nd title… Merry Christmas this week, friends.  I hope you all get to spend some time with family and friends and get to remember the real reason for the season amidst the Santa parts.  As my gift to you, here’s a practice recording of my Madre and I singing “Breath Of Heaven,” one of my favorite Christmas songs.  Mary’s point of view, but also a prayer we could all use for a trial we may be going through.  MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

As a side note… you can ignore in the background the TV being turned full blast because we were too loud.  Story of my life… my family is SO over me singing… moving on, folks… nothing to hear here!   Also, this isn’t meant to be a visual video… since the only thing you get to see is Mary’s stomach… I wasn’t so great at aiming the camera… or remembering the lyrics in the 3rd verse… or… eh well.

I have traveled many moonless nights
Cold and weary with a babe inside
And I wonder what I’ve done
Holy Father, You have come
And chosen me now to carry Your Son

I am waiting in a silent prayer
I am frightened by the load I bear
In a world as cold as stone
Must I walk this path alone?
Be with me now, be with me now

Breath of Heaven, hold me together
Be forever near me, Breath of Heaven
Breath of Heaven, lighten my darkness
Pour over me Your holiness for You are holy
Breath of Heaven

Do you wonder as you watch my face
If a wiser one should have had my place?
But I offer all I am
For the mercy of Your plan
Help me be strong, help me be, help me

Breath of Heaven, hold me together
Be forever near me, Breath of Heaven
Breath of Heaven, lighten my darkness
Pour over me Your holiness for You are holy

Breath of Heaven, hold me together
Be forever near me, breath of Heaven
Breath of Heaven, lighten my darkness
Pour over me Your holiness for You are holy
Breath of Heaven, Breath of Heaven
Breath of Heaven

 

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