Tag Archives: Tony Grove

Mishing and Mashing…

Random blog post alert.  Alert the church elders!  My thoughts seem to be like a big ole pile of scrambled eggs right now, so trying to stick to one topic is going to be mighty trying… oh look, a door.   This will be like running through a mish mash of Madre’s closet mixed with Lindsay’s 6 closets.  A fashionista/muumuu-wearer’s dream come true!

This past Tuesday I had a day off from work on account of the fact that I worked Memorial Day weekend.  What to do on a day off?  The smart answer would have been homework… but sometimes a girl doesn’t use the smart part of her brain, so instead I decided to drive the 45 minutes up to my happy place, Tony Grove.  It was the end of May… surely the snow will have been melted enough to drive up into the lake portion.  Not really… it was looking good at the lower elevations but about 2 miles from the actual lake, I had to turn around on account of the fact that there was a foot or two of snow blocking the road.  Apparently, the sun wasn’t doing its job fast enough.

What do I pay you for?  Sunburns and drought?  Get on with it!  The above picture was about a mile before the snow started blocking the roadway.  Instead I just drove around random lanes and got out and walked when I couldn’t drive further.

Met up with one of my favorite meeses… pretty sure this one is Beelzebub.  Drove over to the Bear Lake lookout where there was a band of bikers relieving themselves in the weeds…  Just because you’re a man doesn’t mean the world is your “R” receptacle!

No pictures of that… moving on… moving on…

I’ll give the sun one more month to get with it… then I’m going back.  Do not disappoint me, sun!

In other news…  I know it’s spring when Madre adds to her criminal history.  I got this picture as proof for the trial.

At the bank… after hours, loading up on lilacs with a pair of pruning shears.  The SHAME!!  THE SHAME!  I was not an accomplice.  I was unwittingly brought to this location with the information that I was going to the grocery store… nothing else.

In less incriminating news… we had our annual backyard-ditch-bank-search-for-the-baby-ducklet outing with my pals, Makayla and her foreign exchange friend, Juanito Bandito, Jr.

Psyche!  That would be Corbin’s evil twin.  We did see some cute duckies, but apparently they weren’t in the mood to pose for any pictures… aka I didn’t get any.

Finally… to the dude sitting in front of me at the USU computer lab yesterday whilst I was trying to take a proctored exam, I am going to blame my less-than-stellar score on the fact that I sat there for 45 minutes whilst you wiped snot particles all over your hands every 3 seconds and then proceeded to use the mouse and keyboard like it was a snottified petri dish!  How’s a girl with 5 billion issues supposed to concentrate after that display of nastiness?  I rest my case!

 

 

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Filed under Family, Life, School

Amelia Bedelia’s In the House…

Who remembers those cute Amelia Bedelia children’s books?  The books about the unfortunate lady who happens to be a clutz and a disaster all rolled into one?  I think she might be my mother.  I had to get the genes from someone!  Tonight, within the space of 20 minutes, I managed to slice a chunk in my thumb whilst cutting onions with a crappy steak knife (useful instruments are my specialty); start a dried noodle that was sticking to the stove on fire; shake what I thought was a closed lid on a bottle of hot sauce which then squirted all over my neck, chin, and hair; and burn a sauteeing onion because I was too busy cleaning up my hot-sauced hair.  Twenty minutes… 52 disasters.  So, basically, the house almost burnt down, I smell like a burnt burrito joint, and I can see the bone in my thumb.  That right there is some TALENT with a capital all the letters!  When I’m done with all that, I think I might come to your house and help you collect some insurance money, yo!  Who’s first in line?

In unrelated news… yesterday, I wanted to make one last jaunt to my happy place to check out some fall leaves… turns out I was about 2 weeks late on the prettiest fall leaves, I guess the snow brought ’em down, instead I got to see some dead trees and trudge through mud, see snow, and brave the wind stinging my hands and nose at something like 35 degrees… with no coat… or socks… or shoes… or diamond-studded headband.  Fine… the socks and shoes were a lie, but the coat and diamond headband are totes the truth!  Eh well… better luck next year, chap.  I still got to see some beauty amidst the dead and cold.

 

The obligatory melting snow picture…

T

 

 

Meanwhile, Lucy-Fur sucks at hide-and-go-seek…

I hope this isn’t a reflection on my hide-and-go-seek skillz.  Seriously, Lucy-Fur!

 

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Filed under Life, Lucy-Fur

Fresh Sardines on a Rock…

This past Saturday we headed up to Tony Grove to have a pic-a-nic for Madre’s birthday.  The whole fam damly came… including the nephews.  They were obviously not as excited about the beauty of Tony Grove as I was.  COME ON!!!  I guess I’m getting geezerly before my official geezer time… because I do enjoy me some nature sitting time… whilst picking spinach out my dentures.  Sadly, the sitting time was limited to as long as it took to eat… and then we did the hike around the lake/grove I have to do every time I go.

The last time I hiked around it, I ended up with dust/dirt caked on my legs clear up to my knees.  It was nastee… and I wasn’t wearing shorts… you are definitely welcome.  I was wearing my usual ugly pants uniform… black and stretchy… but I guess they kept falling down and then sweeping the dust up so it was causing a mini cyclone effect inside my pants legs.  This time I was determined to have silkenly clean legs… so I did what any normal sane person does and I brought rubber bands and then bunched the bottoms of my pants up into balls and secured them with the rubber bands.  I tell you what, Gertrude… you ain’t never seen anyone so dagnabbed fashionable in your entire lifetime.  Project Runway… I’m your next model!  I’m sure Lindsay would have put her head through a brick wall had we not been hidden away amongst the naturey things.  I was doing no favors to my title of Hillbilly Redneck Chic status.  Whatever… everyone was just totes jealous, yo!  It was either that or my bikini… again… YOU ARE WELCOME!  The legs turned out much better this time… some slight dustiness… but only on my socks and bottoms of my rubber-banded pantaloons.

Nephew, Christian demonstrating the 60 dance… 60… YAY!!!

Nephew, Ethan found this nastee dead baby fish thinger… picked it up and then hightailed right on over to me because everyone knows how much I love feeesh… NOT!!!!!!!  Also, you will notice Madre and Lindsay’s hiking foot attire?  I just can’t even with these two.  I CAN’T!

Throw in some caviar and you got yourself a meal fit for a walrus!   GROSS!  I’m afraid that if I was starving to death in the wilderness and my only option for survival was to eat dead fish guts, I’d waste away to nothing.  New weight loss method just waiting to come out? NOT on your life, HCG diet!

Question of the Day:  Have you ever fished?  Do you enjoy eating fish?  

 

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Mood Lifter? Take 2 Nature Pills and Never Call Me Again…

Due to the nature of my job, my days off from work are far and few between.  In the olden days of weighing 530 pounds when I’d have a day off, I’d spend the whole dagnabbed day sleeping intermixed with eating… with a dollop of drooling on the couch whilst watching the Food Network.  That was about as much energy as I could muster back then.  These days I always want to do things.  I use my obsessive planning skillz to make a list of said things I want to do… I like to do something active and outdoorsy… and I like to call up my best pal, Oprah and ask her for a loan.  She must have given me the wrong digits on accident since I always get the disconnected number message when I call.  THE NERVE, Opry!

This past Monday I had a day off… having worked the previous weekend.  I have been lamenting that I haven’t done a dang thing this summer… nothing summery at least… nothing just for the fun of it.  I’ve basically been sticking close to my daily routine… creature of habit… and slave to not enough time in a day!  My plan for this day off was to head up to one of my favorite places on earth, Tony Grove… do a little hike… do a little jig… eat a sandwich in the outdoors… take some pictures… and then just sit in my camp chair in the sun and foam at the mouth… or read, whichever came first.  Due to issues I won’t go into on this here blogging space, my plan to leave in the afternoon did not come to fruition… instead I left at 5:30 to make the 45-minute drive up the canyon… and I was pissed.  No… not pissed… I was madder than a skunk trying to escape a perfume-making factory.  I was mostly mad because I’d wasted a perfectly good day waiting around… and yes, I may have overreacted… but I treat days off like they are rare and precious jewels… and to have missed out on one, angered me.  That, and my control issue of obsessing over schedule… I don’t acclimate very well… just one of the issues on my 5 bajillion-page list of issues I need to work on.

I was tempted just not to go… show them!  But at the last minute, I sucked up my pride and drove on up.  If you’re ever feeling like you want to punch someone in the brainium… just go sit surrounded by breath-taking beauty and shut the heck up… by the time I left a few hours later, I felt like a whole world of anger had been lifted off my shoulders.  Next time I’m not waiting around… I’m just going and doing… and shutting up!

See that HUGE-mongous crow right there… there were approximately 85,000 of his kind flying around and cawing like it was a funeral procession.  My fear of birds didn’t help matters any.

Dude used this canoe to paddle out to within feet of 2 huge bull meeses (cuzzin Carl… where’s my meese-hunting lessons?!!)  Of course I was too whimpy to get close enough to get any pictures of the duo… but they did bathe in the grove for several hours.

Close your eyes and squint real hard like… see those two black-horned things to the right of the grey flat rock… them’s are my meeses!  I named them Fred and Barney.

Go toward the light!  😛  Gladly!  Thank you, Tony and your Grove for providing so much beauty and solace on a bad mood night.  Next time let’s get together for longer, k!?

Question of the Day:  Do you have a place in nature that makes you less grump-tastic?  

 

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Forest People… I Have A Few Notes For You…

I’ve now officially been on 5 hikes this summer, so that totally qualifies me to have a say in changing some of the common practices of the forest.  This past Wednesday I had a day off from work, having worked the previous weekend, so I jaunted myself up to the land of meeses and broken bridges to take in some nature.  I said to myself… Self… there are very few remaining nice days left before winter blankets your soul into an everlasting marsh of despair and sorrow… take advantage!  (No, I hadn’t just been watching Deadly Women… why do you ask?)  I never intended to do an actual hike while I was there… my intention was to sit my rump in a camp chair in the sun and read a book after walking around the lake once.  End of story.  That would explain why I was in no way, shape, or form prepared to do a hike.  Case in point:

My back pack?  A Honks Dollar Store sack which I just happened to rip within the first 5 seconds on the trail.  Most people carry, you know, granola bars and water and a sack lunch and first aid kits and, you know… smart things in their backpacks.  What did I carry in my torn up Honks sack?  3 packages of AA batteries, 8 ounces of water, a camera, and a video recorder.  Why 3 packs of AA batteries?  Obviously, so I could start me a fire using a battery and the rays of the sun and roast invisible marshmallows whilst gnawing on the cardboard battery package.   Plus, if I ran across a fellow hiker whose electric razor ran out of batteries on the trail, I’d be all like… a hero or something.

I also was wearing rocking horse shoes and socks with a hole in the toe… prime hiking gear!  I passed all of these folks on their way down from the trail who were all decked out in their mountainman best… and here I be walking past with a plastic torn-up Honks sack hooked to my arm.  Why the idiotic decision to hike despite the lack of preparation?  I wanted to tell myself I could do it.  And I think I could have done it if I’d actually started at a decent time… instead I started at 4:00 and ended up turning around 80 minutes into the hike up because I was afraid it would be dark before I could make it down and then I’d get trampled by meeses who don’t like AA batteries.  I’m almost sure I was within steps of the final destination of White Pine Lake… but I had been saying that for the last 20 minutes… a girl’s gotta draw the line somewhere.  Besides that fact, downhill for me is a lot more difficult than uphill… just because 2 little ankles ain’t meant to support 298 pounds of weight on precarious, uneven surfaces… all the while fighting with gravity and a holey Honks sack!   Forest people… you ought to consider installing big flashing signs along the trail (after paving it) that say things like:  You’re almost there, sport! or Keep on truckin’, pardner. or Don’t turn around now, you only have 20 feet left.  Something that tells me how the dagnabbed much longer I have to go… come on now!  Who needs an Eagle Scout project!?  I’d do it, but they only allow we girls to make and sell cookies… Thin Mints anyone!?

Three total hours later, I’d made it back to my car, exhausted, dying of thirst, and stiff as a stale corn muffin… just in time to miss the darkness.  I can’t say that I had that much fun on this particular hike, due to my idioticness… and I was stiff and sore in the leg region for a few days afterwards, but I’m still glad I did it… even if I did fall short of the destination… y’all… it’s totes about the journey!

Question of the Day:  Do you consider yourself spontaneous?

This is what I looked like at the start of the trail… literally 2 steps in:

And this would be what I looked like all the way back down:

Except with less neatly brushed hairs.

 

 

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Filed under Exercise, Getting A Life

The Day I Nearly Got Eaten By Meeses!!

You know meeses… them big ugly things, some with big ugly antlers, some with not-so-much big ugly antlers who hang around in the wilderness and charge at people who come too close to them.  THOSE!  Wait a minute… I think I may have gotten all confuzzled with the English language.  If you’re going to call 2 gooses, geese… you need to call 2 mooses meese.  Laws, these language inventors anyway.  I might as well switch out Webster’s with Whitney’s Dictionary of Made Up Words… would totes make more sense… and I’d have conformity amongst the plurals!

Back to my meese (yes, I’m calling them that… take that Merriam Webster!).  This past Mondee, a friend and I took another jaunt up to Tony Grove to walk around the lake and bask in the frigidness of the mountains… plus I totally wanted to see if those 2 skinny dippers were still there.  Who skinny dips in the middle of the day!?  Get a pair of pants, would ya’?  So, we were searching for skinny dippers (I just thought of something… say, I got a concussion and decided it was a brilliant idear for me to swim in a lake in my birthday trousers… that goosebump on my noggin would have to be PRETTY frigging large… would they call my version the fatty dip?  I’m totes seriously curious… I ain’t skinny… but I am a dip…), when all of a sudden I look up to see 2 meese (a momma and a baby) approximately 20 feet away… of course I scream like a little girly girl, which in turn scares the frig out of momma and baby who take off like it’s all-you-can-eat lunch buffet at the NutriSystem Convention… before I even have a chance to get my camera out… pose for pictures angry momma… seriously now.  That’s no way to treat your guests.

Oh, but I’m determined… even though I know for a fact meese do not like to be approached… especially with a baby in tow.  You know the Big Bad Wolf in that 3 Little Pigs tale?  The wolf was actually based on a meese.  Okay, so that was totally a lie… but how many people believed me?  Raise your hands.  Meese attack when they feel threatened and I’m sure me and my 90-dollar camera were threatening with a capital T!  We hike through the woods a little further and run right back into momma and baby meese… eating a person!!!!!  What did you say!?  Meese are herbivores?  Not these meese!  Okay, so that was another lie.  They weren’t eating a person, they were eating some vegetation… sue me, I’m totally trying to spice up this story for y’all!  I cursed the heavens for my lack of cajones and 90-dollar zoomless lens camera.  Instead of getting an amazeballs picture of meese all cuddling with her young fry, I got this:

Do not even tell me you can’t see my meese!  No, that is not a horse, of course!  We watched our step the rest of the trail, but when we were driving down the mountain, we ran into 2 HUGE Meese with big ole ugly antlers.  Of course, I didn’t get any pictures of them since they seemed to be more interested in running in the opposite direction of the huge machine we were driving down the mountainside.  Somehow meese are approximately 34 times smarter than, say, a cow.

See that blackish spot underneath the tree… that’s totally my meese butt!  I got a picture of a meese butt!  Forget the antlers, this baby’s gonna make it into National Geographic.  I would have ventured down the mountainside further, but the car door only opens so far and I was using that as my shield.  Next time I head up, remind me to wear my suit of armour.  Totally meese hunting gear right there!

Question of the Day:  What was your most exciting animal encounter?  Have a GRAND weekend, my friends!

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Road Blocks… Who Chew Cud…

I’m one of those weird folk who walk around trying to learn a lesson from everything… mostly I just make up something and run with it.  And I’m in love with analogies… give me two totally not even relatable things and I’ll make up some analogy to link them.  I dare you… DO IT… but now right now, I’ve got me some hair washing to do… and tomorrow through January 2345 is busy on account of the toenail clipping I’ve got going on.

Tuesdee, we loaded up the car, pic-a-nic in tow this time, to head back up to Tony Grove for 3 reasons:  to take in the beauty in the last few nice days before winter blankets my soul into the depths of despair (too dramatic?), have an impromptu birthday celebration for 4-year-old Corbin, and watch Madre hike around the lake in worse shoes than the last time… we’re talking gladiator sandals with a sole as thick as a piece of tissue paper.  Hi rocks… meet my little piggies… and I can guarantee you the baby piggy done cried wee, wee, wee all the way home!

As we made the ascent to the top of the grove, all along the windy road were cows.  Big cows, little cows, cows with horny things, cows with manure caked to their receptacles (how did you guess those were my favorites?)… just all sorts of mooing soon-to-be hamburger patties… and most of them were parking themselves int he middle of the road.  We had a bunch of fun laying on the horn, scaring the cruditis out of them so that they would eventually scamper off to the side of the road.

This dude was kind enough to chew his cud on the side of the road… table manners were ATROCIOUS, though… Like Totes!  Bessy… you got some sputz on the side of your mouth. 

We found ourselves having to stop every few feet to wait for the cows to get out of the road just so we didn’t make them ground sirloin too early in their lives… and there were a lot of these road blocks, but they never lasted for long… they’d eventually get to using the common sense bone and move out of the way.  I took that opportunity to make up a lesson learned for my journey… there have been road blocks and will be many more to come, but they never last long… there will always be a way through if I’m patient and just keep moving forward.  I’m not saying a BB gun wouldn’t have been helpful, but sometimes you gotta deal with the manure before you can bask in the field of daisies.

Question of the Day:  Do you consider yourself a patient person?  Why or why not? 

Y’all wouldn’t believe me if I said the cow on the left was listening to Madonna’s Vogue song.  Strike a pose, there’s nothing to it!  They were going clubbing… Jersey Shore style!

Happy 4th Birthday, Corbin!

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