South of the Utah Border…

I feel like I should reintroduce myself… but then I realized the 3 people who still read this blog could care less as long as I provide free reasons for them to feel like they’re pretty much normal in comparison to me.  You are welcome, 3 people… you are welcome!  I haven’t posted for 2 weeks for good reasons… the first Monday that went by without a post was due to the fact that I had procrastinated my 6-page English empirical research report for far too long and then I had an identity crisis due to the fact that I never ever procrastinate… I also never lie or embellish the truth.  What’s an exaggeration?

The second Monday went by without a post due to the fact that I was in Albuquerque, New Mexico visiting my cuzzin Jen-Jen and her adorbs family.  Yes, I stayed in a germy hotel room for 5 days… and I lived to tell about it!  Granted, I did pack my own sheets, Clorox wipes, and hand soap.  CoughCoughPSYCHOCoughCough…

Jen-Jen and her husband, Seth just had their 2nd son in January, Blaize Isaac (insert last name here)… add him to their busy 2-year-old Cruz, and they have their hands full!  We ventured down (and by we, I mean my sister Lindsay and Madre) to try to help her out for a few days… freezer meals and cleaning were on the agenda… plus some fun stuff in between.

When we arrived Thursday evening, Jen had disobeyed my orders (think of me as a British war general but wayyyy less British and without a war) that she was not to do any cooking and had dinner all ready!!  JENNIFER!  I still ate it because Jen is a great cook and hello it was delicious and such deliciousities shouldn’t go to waste, but you ought to have seen the stink eye I gave her.  Guarantee she is lifetime scarred by it.  😛

The next morning we took the kids to the Albuquerque aquarium.  Fish are much tastier when you’re looking at them through a glass partition.  That is the truth!  What I learned from that outing was that 4 adult women were still not enough to keep track of one adorable, but busy 2-year-old.  We lost him approximately 18 times… and because he wouldn’t hold still for 5 seconds, I got some winning pictures of the back of his head:

In this one he’s wondering why we didn’t think it would be a good idea for him to get into the water.  And then I got a great mother/son shot on top of the star fish:

He was more interested in the new girlfriend(s) he met.  Sorry, Jen!  You are already being replaced.   I spent 10 seconds taking a picture of the sharks… and that was time #17 we lost Cruz…

The only time he stood still was when this SCUBA diving chic came down into the tank to hand feed the fish… then the boy was transfixed for like 10 minutes.  I told Jen she should just try to hire one of those SCUBA chics as a nanny.

I’m sure the SCUBA chic wasn’t at all self-conscious that we were staring at her.  Also, I realized that SCUBA/fish-feeding chic is not on my list of job options.  NO THANK YOU!!

That evening we had a joint birthday celebration for Mr. Cruz and Lindsay.

Cruz got all sorts of fun gifts, but his favorite were socks and a bicycle helmet.  The bike helmet came with a bike… but I think he liked the helmet the most since he wore it the rest of the day.

And then there was the cake incident!  I’m sure Jen and Seth will never want us to return again after we encouraged Cruz to have horrible manners by laughing at him and waking up the baby in the process!

This is quite possibly the cutest video EVER… but I’m not biased!

The rest of the trip included touring Old Town in ABQ:

Eating wayyyyy too much food!!  Stop the DietBet, y’all folks!

Getting pedicures…

I think mine and Cruz’s are obviously the best.  I call mine socks and slippers!   And there was a lot of hanging out with two of my favorite buddies!

Next time Blaize better get in on the act… he mostly slept, ate, and dirtied diapers!  The life of a baby!  Where do I sign up?  Not for a baby, but to have the life of a baby.

I miss my little buddies already!  Thanks, Jen and Seth for letting us hang out for a few days.  Y’all better build a wing onto the house, I might move in next time!  😛

I Da Ho… No… U ta ho….

What up friendly friendlies?  The weekend is over I am only slightly dumber than I was last week around this time.  That’s an upgrade from the usual Monday when I end up a LOT dumber than the previous Mondee.  I must have retained a few more brain cells due to the fact that I spent my weekend in my birthplace, Rexburg, Idaho… which, ironically is also the birthplace of wind (sorry, Oprah… Chicago ain’t got nothing!).   The wind mostly behaved this weekend… so unfortunately I could not blame my messy hair on anything but myself.  LAME!!!  We drove up Friday morning and met my cuzzin, Jen-Jen in Idaho Falls where we had promised to help her shop for some maternity clothes to cover her growing pregnant belly.  I can understand why she needed my help with clothing shopping.  I am one of the top 10 fashionistas of the parachute and tent-like clothing fashion council… pregnant women will more than likely own at least one parachute-shaped item of clothing, so y’all… give me a ring next time you need some advice.  I have it growing out my belly button… literally.  Instead of getting right to the clothes buying, we spent the first 30 minutes searching for my missing camera, which I’d left sitting on a sweater at The Gap because I’m just that senile.

Lindsay cannot get away from a shopping trip without trying on at least 800 items of clothing, so she (NOT PREGNANT AT ALL) was not swayed when she found herself banned to the maternity section… and ended up walking out with at least one maternity dress.  Oh my addicted-to-all-things-wearable sister… what will we ever do with your 5 closets of clothing when you leave this earth?

Lindsay and Jen-Jen trying on their clothing.  We set up shop in the dressing rooms pretty much while dad drooled his way to boredom out by the housecoats.

Why yes… that’s possibly one of the UGLIEST MuuMuus yet… and she talked us into buying it for her Christmas present.  Oh laws… does anyone have any blinding glasses I could borrow?  I cannot look at that thing all winter.   We also learned that dad is still winning the pregnant belly contest:

After lunch at Johnny Carino’s where the family ate their weight in fried octupus tenticles (THANK ALL THAT BE HOLY I’M A VEGETARIAN!!!!!), we headed to Jen and Seth’s house in Rexburg where I was going to stay the night.  I tell you, they are the host and hostesses with the mostesses.  They fed me yummified VEGETARIAN tortilla soup for dinner; worried about my warmth ratio; and the fact that her dog, Joey, enjoyed licking me.  I got a turn-down-the-bed gift of 2 adorbs cat food bowls and a book on how to train your new kitten to make money in the circus.  Jen also put on a cleaning show using her Melaleuca Tough and Tender counter spray whilst wearing an eskimo jacket and elbow-length pink rubber gloves… that’s how these Rexburgians roll, I tell you what!

The next morning after breaking into the family’s hotel to eat free breakfast (SHHHHHHHHH… they owed us one after a big ole football dude threw up in the elevator), we headed to the real reason we showed up in Rexburg, my cuzzin Michael’s wedding.  What a beautiful couple they made!

Mike and Jessica were troopers because it was chilly out there for picture time and the rest of us had coats and gloves.  The highlights of the day were hanging out with the extended fam, meeting my aunt Katie for the first time (what up, Katie), and passing around the cute lil daughter of my cuzzin Spencer and his wife, Anne.  Bethany cried approximately ZERO times whilst being passed around the group like a football in China… what an angel baby… and adorable to boot!

Auntie Jess with baby Bethany.

There’s me and Jen-Jen creeping cheesily into the pitcher.  Oh my laws, Whitney… never look like you’ve overdosed on Valium again!  Lindsay was enamoured, especially when the cute little thing enjoyed sleeping on her fur vest.  Shhhh… don’t tell Lindsay that… she thinks the baby liked her for her… not her vest.  I stumbled my way through the singing of 2 songs for the wedding luncheon, L-O-V-E by Nat King Cole and Blessed the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts.  All in all… twas a successful shindig.  Thank you hosts and Rexburg nation.  Let’s do it again sometime… preferrably in the summer!

Question of the Day:  What do y’all think of Madre’s new muumuu!?!?!?!?  Please help me… PLEASE!!!  😛

Learning From the Naturally Thin Folk of the World…

The next question on my List journey:  Ask someone you know about the kind of foods that they eat.

There has always been this myth that a naturally thin person can eat whatever the heck crap they want and still not gain a pound… but that ain’t true.  It may be true of the young folks whose metabolism hasn’t quite caught up to them yet… my metabolism went downhill at the age of 6 months… no jokes right there… chubby baby alert… but once they hit their 20s the bad eating usually catches right up to them and then they become adults with weight problems.  But, to remain naturally thin for your whole life is something that requires work… healthy eating and exercise, and just a general healthy way to deal with emotions other than shove food down the ole gullet!

I asked my adorbs cuzzin, Jen-Jen to guest blog on this subject because she is naturally thin and she works at staying that way… even now when she (and her husband Seth… wut up, Seth!?) are expecting their first child after years of trying.  She is truly the most healthy eater I know… and she too believes in an all things in moderation method.  If a naturally thin person stays thin using this method, then it makes sense for we who need to lose weight to also adopt the same method… she doesn’t eat a crazy “die”t.   That’s just preposterous, Humpty!  Below is in Jen-Jen’s words!  Thank you, Jen!  You rock and I’m glad you’re my good pal and cuzzin!  Love you!

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Health and nutrition has always been a topic of interest to me. Now that I am expecting, I feel even more inclined to make sure I am putting wholesome foods in my body, because more than anything I want a healthy baby. I totally and completely agree with Whitney’s strategy for nutrition which is eating healthy, but still allowing yourself those guilty pleasures in moderation. Eating healthy should be a lifestyle, not an extreme, drastic diet. Maybe I just don’t have the will power, but I don’t find it necessary for myself personally to abstain from sugar, white flour, fat, etc.

My three biggest challenges for eating healthy are:

1. My taste buds! I have always struggled with being a picky eater, and a heightened gag reflex during pregnancy hasn’t helped. During the first 18-20 weeks of pregnancy, I really struggled with eating green vegetables so I drank a tall glass of V8 every day, and extra fruit servings to make up the difference.
2. Working Night Shifts. It is tempting to eat candy and drink soda to stay awake while working; but I overcome that by packing my own snacks and avoiding the cafeteria and vending machines at work. I do allow myself one small indulgence or treat while working though. It keeps me going at 3 AM.
3. I love to cook and bake! Trying new recipes is a hobby and obsession for me. I still make those things that are high in calories; just not every single day. I have had to limit myself to making only 1 dessert a week.

Currently I am 23 weeks pregnant and my total weight gain thus far has been about 10 lbs. I know gaining weight is essential to a healthy pregnancy, as long as those pounds are healthy ones.

I pretty much eat the same things now that I did before I was pregnant with a few modifications. Pregnant women should try to eat about 300 extra calories a day. That doesn’t mean to go McDonald’s every day. These extra calories should be nutrient-rich foods. In the beginning of my pregnancy, I utilized MyFitnessPal.com to track my calories, carbs, and fat to give me an idea of what I should eat and how much. Here is a sample of my typical diet:

Breakfast

• Oatmeal or Kashi Go Lean Crunch Cereal
• Low-fat yogurt
• Banana
• Glass of low-fat milk

Lunch

Since lunch meat is not an option during pregnancy, I find other ways to get my protein at lunch in one of these sandwich options:

• PB and Honey Sandwich (I always use 100% whole grain bread)
• Egg salad sandwich (using a low-fat Mayo)
• Chicken salad sandwich

My lunch also might include an apple and carrot/celery sticks or cucumber slices with a glass of milk.

Dinner

Because I like to cook and try new recipes, I rarely eat the same thing for dinner repeatedly. I do usually pair a protein with a vegetable and a whole grain. One of my favorite dinners is stir fry because it has all three of those things in one dish.

Snacks

It is important to keep healthy snack options available so you are always prepared when hunger strikes (which is quite often for me lately). When I am hungry at home, it is a no-brainer; I just open the cupboard or refrigerator and choose something. I also like to keep something in my purse or car to prevent me from going through the drive-thru if I suddenly get hungry while out running errands. Little snack-size Ziploc bags are a regular thing on my grocery list, so I can fill them with healthy snacks to pack with me wherever I go.

Healthy Snack Options:

• Hardboiled egg
• Applesauce
• Low-fat cottage cheese with fruit (if you don’t like plain cottage cheese, try mixing it with some raspberry yogurt-Delicious!)
• String Cheese
• Whole-wheat toast or English muffin with PB
• A tall glass of V8
• Apple or other fresh fruit
• Homemade Fruit Smoothie with lots of berries
• Reduced fat Wheat Thins of Triscuits
• FiberOne Bar
• Low-fat yogurt with granola and berries
• Nuts and dried fruit

My occasional indulgences:

• Lately I love pudding! I either make it homemade or eat the pudding cups they stock in the refrigerator at my work.
• Hot Cocoa
• Pie or Cake
• Sour Patch Kids
• Homemade Cookies
• Banana Bread or other sweet bread
• Fruit Loops Cereal
• Chips covered in melted cheese with salsa
• Hot Fudge Sundaes from Dairy Queen

Well that about sums it up. Hopefully you have found my eating strategies useful. I greatly admire my cousin Whitney for being so consistent and determined to live a healthier lifestyle. She has got incredible will-power and persistence and I know she will reach all of her goals.

This picture was a pre-pregnancy menu for Jen… but it gives you a good idea of what her food day, as far as quantities, would look like.  Say hi to Jen in the comment section!

Question of the Day:  What have you learned about eating from a naturally thin person?   If you’re a “naturally thin” person what’s your secret?  Any tips? 

PS – Have a superb weekend my sweet friends and relations.  I appreciate each and everyone of you… more than you know!  Do something crazy this weekend… report back on Mondee! 

My Weekend With Swans and Bamboo Princesses…

Many people don’t know that I, in fact, was quite the ballerina back in the olden days.  I had a role in the lesser known ballet, Swine Lake… the sequel to Swan Lake, but with swines instead of swans.  I was the understudy to the understudy to the understudy of the 15th background swine.  It’s a shame that ballet never caught on… it really did bring an awareness to the swine population… they ain’t all snorting and mud rolling.

Well… wasn’t that a sweet little story… moving on.  This weekend, I ventured with the family to Idaho Falls… about a 2-1/2-hour jaunt from where my couch lives.  We went to see my cute cuzzin, Jennifer’s  much anticipated ballet recital.  Jen-Jen is pretty much like my 2nd sister.  We all grew up together and she stayed with us many summers as a kid/teenager.  Lindsay and I love to tease our little cuzzin… mostly about her slow progression into an old lady (aka our grandma’s twin).  We like to call her little Ella (grandma’s name) because she enjoys wearing her bathrobe and slipper socks all day, carrying rotted bananas around in her purse, and using phrases like I’ve never had that before!  Which is code for, I want a bite of whatever you are eating, but can’t come right out and just say that.  We sure do love our little Ella!    

Me, Jen-Jen, and Lindsay with our new friend, Marlboro Man, John Wayne... and to think he never offered us a cig... what a drag!

To be brutally honest, I think pretty much the only ballet I’d seen in person was The Nutcracker.  PERIOD!  I’ve always thought that ballerinas were beautiful, graceful, strong dancers, but I’d just never fell into the craze.  I take that back… I did take ballet lessons when I was like 5 and 6 years old… and by ballet, I really mean moving my arms in a stiff fashion to some music and being the tallest and largest kid in the class.  I stood out like Andre the Giant in a pile of kindergartners… and I was horridly unflexible.  While all the other little girls were busy doing their splits, I was still trying to master reaching down to touch my toes.  Needless to say, I have always admired folks who can dance! 

The ballet was based on a Japanese folktale entitled The Bamboo Princess and featured all ages… from little bitty kids to adults… and I’m pretty sure every last one of them dancers had more coordination in their pinky fingers than I did in my whole danged body.  It was fun to watch the story told through dance and even an uncultured nondancer such as myself could keep up with all the pirouettes and plies and crochets (oops… wrong line of business).  Not to be biased or anything, but I thought Jen-Jen’s class did the best of all the groups.  Not that I know anything about ballet, but I thought that they were the most organized and synchronized and I loved their pretty gold-leafed fans.  Jen-Jen, I give your performance skillz a 10/10… and the dude sitting behind me who kept whooping and hollering like he was at a cow ropin’ competition… I give you a 2/10.  Thanks for inviting us, Jen and for culturing this girl with the rhythm of a deadened tree trunk. 

Beautiful Jen-Jen posing for and with her fan(s)!

Question of the Day:  Do you like to dance?  If so, which kind of dance is your preferred boogying method?